What are you thinking?
It's a question we often ask our friends or colleagues, but it is a question we rarely ask ourselves. I mean really take the time out to actually listen to your thoughts and work out what they are and how they are making you feel.
Our internal thoughts are not who we are, they are only a small part of who we are but it is sometimes hard to see that. If you can start to see a thought for what it is, you can start to see the world and life in a different way, rather than confused with how your thoughts are seeing it.
And why are so many of our thoughts negative, why do we give ourselves such a hard time, criticising ourselves and sabotaging our own confidence and development? Everyone has these negative thought patterns but you need to learn to recognise them and then start to see why you are doing the things you do and reacting and behaving as you are. You then need to be kinder to yourself and limit these thoughts so that they don't spiral out of control.
You may be reacting to things deep in our memory, so buried that you have no idea what they are, events and thoughts and experiences that you can't even remember, yet they still drive your actions. If we are spending time dwelling on negative thoughts and worrying about things that have happened or may never happen, you are missing out on life, and it is way too short to be living in the past.
Here are a few ways to recognise your thoughts and change your negative thinking.
1) Accept that you have anxieties or concerns, but don't let them define who you are. You can take control of them. Notice them and recognise them by all means and you can even write them down and measure them on a scale of 1 to 10. You can then work out reasons you may be feeling this way and see how realistic they are.
2) Think about what you would tell your friend if they were feeling this way, and see how this differs to what you are telling yourself
3) Learn some quick coping strategies when you feel anxious or uncomfortable. Here's one to try.
Firstly just sit quietly and think about your breathing, going in and out, counting 10 breaths. Notice the sounds around you and then focus on your breathing again. Now feel your feet on the floor and just focus on how they feel, before again bringing your attention back to your breathing.
Now, just allow any emotion to come into your mind, whatever surfaces, and see if you can identify where in your body you feel that most and give it a name. You could call it frustration, or a colour or a Disney character, anything that come to mind, but just a word. Now focus on that feeling again and see if it feels different. Step back and see that emotion as a bystander would, and just accept it.
If you feel an emotion, just stop and take note of it and give it a label. It doesn’t need to have been caused by anyone or anything. Once you have labelled the emotion they often recede and you can move on.
If you would like any help with your thoughts, anxieties and emotions, talking about them can help and you can take control back, and change how they affect your behaviour. Talking therapy in conjunction with hypnotherapy can reinforce these changes in your mind and make a real difference. Just so you know, as many people think hypnosis is a bit weird, but during hypnotherapy, you remain in complete control and choose to follow the suggestions that are based on your goals, and you can't be made to do or say anything under hypnosis that you wouldn't want to out of it.
thanks for reading